A lesson the Corinthians should have learned

On Friday myself and 65 Cal Poly students returned from a week on Catalina Island for what we call "Spring Break Camp". At Camp students spend over 8 hours a day doing inductive manuscript study of a part of Scripture- which is actually amazing, contrary to how it sounds.
I was co-leading the 1st 13 chapters of 1 Corinthians (we just barely skimmed Chapter 7, since none of our students are married), and I felt that pieces of Paul's writing went deeper into my heart and challenged me as I went through the material a second time, and this time as a teacher. It's kind of funny how much you learn teaching. But it was the students in our group who brought the text to life more than anything.

We had this wonderful group of 9 students (there they are happily manuscripting) and the group was absolutely perfect for a study on 1 Corinthians because of the diversity of students we had. We had 6 Cal Poly students, all of whom are older leaders, a student with a mental handicap from CSU Bakersfield, a student from Great Basin College in Elko, NV, and a pastor from Elko who just takes classes for fun and helps out with InterVarsity. 

It would seem like such a random group of students would be a challenge for teaching in terms of cohesiveness, and the worry would be that the non-Cal Poly people would be left out,  and that the student with the mental handicap would be difficult to deal with. And as we were reading 1 Corinthians, that seems to be exactly what the church in Corinth was doing- dividing and sticking with who they liked best and leaving out the poor, and lording it over one another. 

But this group did exactly the opposite. The were welcoming and accepting of one another, and came in with humble attitudes ready to learn from everyone else. Having an older pastor in our group with incredible life experience and a perspective that college students often miss was an huge blessing, and not to mention that he was a virtual Greek dictionary. His humility was amazing, and at the end of the week when we affirmed each other, one of the students, Brian, said that he wanted to be like Pastor Dan when he got older and be willing to spend a week with a bunch of college students. Pastor Dan said he had the option of going to Spring Break Camp or going to a Pastor's conference in the fall, and he decided to come to camp because "honestly, this is more encouraging". 

Having a student with a mental handicap not only helped the other students (especially Cal Poly) get out of their comfort zones, but her insight in the class was incredible. Although at times it was difficult, her presence made the things the church at Corinth was struggling with become very real, and I think the students handled it way better than the Corinthians did. The students loved her well, and as my co-leader Paul said, her communication issues are on the surface for everyone to see. We all have communication issues, but ours are just hidden. We're not so different from her, and actually we have a lot to learn from her.

The students were really vulnerable with how they were interacting with the text and the application questions we gave them, and what was amazing was the student who led the way in vulnerability was Laura, the student from Great Basin who knew no one else in the group except a Pastor. Her honest expression of what she was struggling with helped all the other students to be vulnerable the rest of the week. 

I learned a lot about the way the church is supposed to love and care for one another, and everyone in the class saw how far we in the church often act like the Corinthians and fall short of our call to become slaves for each other. We learned to give up our entitlements to the things we think we need or enjoy in our lives for the sake of others, and that the spiritual gifts we are to strive for are not necessarily the ones we feel gifted in, but the ones that the church most needs at the time.

I saw the students love each other well. Paul would have been proud.

My New Favorite Website

My boyfriend showed me this website a few weeks ago, and it came at the perfect time, because I was just thinking about how I wanted to get a prayer book. But here is a prayer book online! It is http://commonprayer.net/. Today part of the prayer was especially helpful for me:

Julian of Norwich wrote in the fourteenth century, “The worst has already happened and been repaired. . . . All shall be well, all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.”


Lord, we are grateful that you can use every experience to draw us closer to you. Our trials and triumphs alike can finally be sown in the garden of our faith. Amen.

Prayer Walks and God's Movement

After National Staff Conference in early January, I felt God pulling me towards more intentional and regular prayer. What that has turned into is prayer walks on campus each day that I go to campus. Here are some of the things that God has brought up on the prayer walks:

-A few times I have been drawn to the Administration Building. The first time the Scripture from Isaiah that says "The people walking in darkness have seen a great light" kept coming up, and it was clear that there is a lot of darkness among Cal Poly's administrators, particularly in regards to low income and minority students. It is clear that Cal Poly is far behind other state universities in regards to diversity and helping first generation or low income students succeed, and that Jesus' light needs to penetrate that area of darkness. At a seminar I attended at Staff Conference, the woman giving the seminar was a professor from Rice University, and she was listing the reasons why students stay or leave college. One of the indicators for whether or not students stay in college is if they have a minority professor within their first year or college, and this is true regardless of the students' ethnicity. There are very few minority professors at Cal Poly, and so I prayed that God would bring more diversity among the faculty.

-One day myself and another student, Matt, were praying for the Business Building, and the Business majors who have classes there. God kept bringing up the need for selflessness among business majors, and so we prayed that as business students graduate and begin making lots of money, we prayed that they would use the money for others, and not for themselves. We also prayed that God would protect the Christian business majors, and give them boldness and conversations that lead towards God with their classmates.

-I was walking and praying around the Architecture Building (and I prayed that God would give the overworked Architecture majors rest) and behind the building I was really drawn to some stone sculptures. The sculptures look like they were once beautiful and ornate, but now they are broken apart, dirty, and overgrown with plants. God said very clearly "these are the hearts of students on this campus. Pray that these stones would come alive." So I paced in front of  them (I'm sure people walking by thought I was really strange) and prayed that God would bring to live the broken and overgrown hearts of Cal Poly students, so they could be beautiful as they were meant to be.

-A couple times I've been drawn to the Liberal Arts Faculty Office Building (maybe because I was a Liberal Arts major myself) and I have gotten a strong sense that there is a lot of spiritual warfare surrounding the Liberal Arts professors. Often, certain Liberal Arts classes and professors are the ones that can be very difficult for Christian students, as they openly attack Christianity. I myself have experienced this, and I have talked to a couple of students this year who are struggling in some of these classes. So I prayed that God would show Himself, and bring light to this place that can be dark.

-My fellow staff member and friend Sydney and I were praying one day and we prayed very hard that God would protect students in our fellowship from Academic Probation (AP). In talking with one of the faculty who I am closer with who works in student advising, she has been talking about how Cal Poly is beginning to really crack down on AP students, and is beginning to go as far as to kick students out if they are on AP for one quarter. Already AP has affected a few students in our fellowship, and so we prayed for God's protection.

-Yesterday myself and another student went to the room were a Black History Month event was to be held last night. We prayed over the room, and prayed that the place would be Holy Ground, and that Satan would have no place in the room. We prayed that the walls that a lot of black students at Cal Poly put up because of the difficult environment of the campus would come down that night. As we were leaving, the craziest thing happened! In the room there are these long curtains that cover the tall windows, and as we were about to walk out I saw these 4 legged creature looking things scurrying out the top of the curtains. It was clear that our prayers were driving out the things that aren't of God! I thought that was pretty awesome, because I had never seen anything like that before.
We then went to the Health and Counseling Service center and prayed for students struggling with depression. We prayed that they would not keep their struggles to themselves, but would seek out the help they need. We prayed that God would speak through the counselors, and that God would put people in their lives who love Him and can remind them of their worth.

So that is just a few of the things that God has brought up. Needless to say, He is moving, and it has been kind of amazing for me to see His movement, as well as to be more aware of spiritual warfare that goes on. I believe that it is strengthening my faith as well, and it has been a huge reminder of how little I do and how much God does.

Reflections on Sexuality

          A couple weeks ago, we had our Divisional Staff Meetings that centered around the topic of sexual brokenness and seeking sexual wholeness, and it got me thinking. In reality, this is a topic that I have been on a journey to understand why it is that God wants us to wait to have sex until marriage, and what it means to remain pure. I had a hunch that it was more than not having sex and avoiding sexual thoughts, and that thinking about purity that way wasn't very helpful.
         At Cal Poly this past quarter, the issues of sexual brokenness have come up and hit everyone in the fellowship, as students have been honest about the ways that they are sexually broken. It is amazing that the students are so incredibly honest, and it has started the journey of healing for them, but our staff team wanted to shepherd them well. We had a leaders meeting where we talked about boundaries- physical, emotional, and personal boundaries, and helped the leaders see ways that they could avoid going too far and ending up in painful situations. It was a great meeting, and students found it incredibly helpful, but at our next staff meeting I presented the thought that had been in the back of my mind- that the students need to know why they have the boundaries, and why it is that that God tells us that sex is for marriage. I feel that too many Christians have just been told to not have sex until marriage, and they're not sure why. Doing something just because you're told not to can lead to confusion and problems later if there isn't a solid foundation of understanding, and belief that God has our best in mind when He gives us laws.
          At the Divisional Staff Meetings, we read a chapter from a book called "The Holy Longing" by Ronald Rolheiser. The Chapter was called "A Spirituality of Sexuality," and he described how our understanding of sexuality is too limited. We only equate sexuality with the act of having sex, where as in reality is it so much larger than that. The Greek origin of the word sex means to be cut off, and the author described how sexuality is our longing to reconnect after we were cut off from God and each other at the Fall. Our sexuality is our longing for connection with things outside ourselves, and that means more than the act of sex.
         But there are many ways that we seek to fulfill that connection in ways that actually hurt us. One of the things the author talked about was how our culture fails to see how sex can actually be hurtful. I, like the author, have heard people talk about how sex really never hurt anyone, when in reality we are learning more and more how much it can. The sexual abuse of children, sex used as a tool of power, as a means of revenge, and as a selfish way to make oneself feel good- which can lead to pain later in life when someone may want to be unselfish with sex- all of these are ways that sex is incredible hurtful.
         Our sexuality- our longing for connectedness- really should point us towards God, as even human relationships are meant for our benefit, but also to remind us of the God who ultimately fulfills our relationship longings. Sexuality is misunderstood and misused, and the church has been at best silent, and at worst negative about a topic that everyone deals with perhaps more than almost anything else. At the Divisional Meetings, it was so freeing to be able to openly and honestly have a discussion about what we deal with and what those around us deal with. Its another step along the journey.

I just have to say, how bout them Giants?

A Balance and a Tension

At Orientation for New Staff, one of the aspects of ministry they tried to prepare us for was the need to understand the balance and tension between our action and God's action. Of course, God does all the real work, but we can't sit around and do nothing, otherwise we would miss out on a whole heap of blessing. I am learning in the 2 weeks I've been in full-time ministry, that it is a difficult tension for me to grasp, especially since I tend towards wanting to do work all by myself, and God has to constantly remind me of the futility of doing so. I especially feel the pressure because, technically, ministry is my job, and jobs mean you do work for a salary.
But ministry as a job is different, and I am finding it means a whole lot of letting go. And a whole lot of prayer. One of my ministry emphases (and one that is very dear to my heart) is ministry to minority students, and this is a ministry (especially at Cal Poly) that comes up against a lot of spiritual strongholds. This means that God REALLY has to do the work, and I need to do a whole lot of praying. It is a good but hard thing to learn, especially at Cal Poly where efficiency and productivity are next to godliness, and sometimes people confuse them for godliness. It is not an easy culture to remember that being a Christian is about BEING, not doing. That doesn't mean action is excluded, but I know for me, God is leading me towards a whole lot of prayer.

The Real Spiritual Life

"Our spiritual life is His affair; because, whatever we may think to the contrary, it is really produced by His steady attraction, and our humble and self-forgetful response to it. It consists in being drawn, at His pace and in His way, to the place where He wants us to be; not the place we fancied for ourselves."

-Evelyn Underhill